I know you love me but if you follow me I'll love you too!

Monday, 11 April 2011

NaPoWriMo 2011 Day Eleven

Brenda put a wordle together for todays prompt.
Laugh, Corrugated, Gloomy, Hovels, Words, Feeble,
Crucial, Hum, Cobwebs, Dandelion, Scrambling, Ash.

SHOUTS FROM THE TOP FLOOR
Scrambling over hot Parisian coals,
the heat underfoot making his feet bleed,
He stumbles on the ash in the attic.
Taking a slurp of dandelion soup.
The corrugated cardboard cut-out girl
at the counter starts to laugh as he hums.
Words escape as she sings a feeble song,
the cobwebs vibrate in the gloomy room.

It's crucial that these hovels be demolished soon!
a do-gooder shouts from the top floor of Modigliani's house.
11042011

Posted to Writer's Island
Read my Sewina Sestina
JOIN ME ON FACEBOOK
Posted to Writer's Island
I Hate Poets Proper Joe's
STOP PRESS
ONE OF MY ANTI-SMOKING POEMS
Day Eleven 2010
THE POEM THAT WROTE ITSELF
Day Eleven 2009

17 comments:

  1. Cool wordle, but did Modigliani allow doogooders into his house?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Stan, the do-gooder came to save Modi's life and found that he had to wade through a sea of empty wine bottles and sardine cans - he took Modigliani to the free hospital in Montparnasse, where he died.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Excellent wordle, Andy and I did not know that bit about Amedeo Modigliani. Learn something new every day.

    Pamela

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi Pamela, if you like Modigliani here's a link to one of the poems I wrote about him: http://sewina.blogspot.com/2007/10/for-national-poetry-day.html

    ReplyDelete
  5. Your last two lines made me burst out laughing. I like Modigliani too - envy his models that long look. Being short, with no neck, he'd never have chosen me.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I love this phrase: 'ash in the attic'.

    It's good to learn something; thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I've always liked Modigliani so imagining the scene was perfect.

    ReplyDelete
  8. First, thanks for working Modigliani into your poem, one of my favorite artists. Second, the "corrugated cardboard cut-out girl," what an inspired phrase. This worked so well, Andy!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wordles are a real challenge, and you were up to it. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Very imaginatively done and fun. I like laughing cardboard girl.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Forgot to leave you a tidbit!
    http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/04/11/maybe-now-pa-npwm-11/

    Amy

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm so glad you posted on my page, because it made me curious to see what you'd written on yours. Thanks!

    I love this Wordle! Modigliani's house - what brilliance! ☼

    ReplyDelete
  13. Thank you for this brilliant post that led me to knowledge of an artist with whom I was not familiar. It was fascinating to read of his tragic ending and that of Jeanne as well.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Like what you did with the wordle. I usually don't like them, but this group of words seem to pull me in. I'd say they did the same for you. Impressive,

    Elizabeth

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thanks Gloria, and not only Jeanne, there was the unborn baby too, because she was nine months pregnant with their second child when she died.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Corrugated cardboard cut-out girl. Wow. That image is fantastic and the words sound so great. I imagine her propped up in the attic as a companion with her own bowl of dandelion soup.

    Mike

    ReplyDelete
  17. the first one is cruel truth. i really wonder how can a leader have that much audacity.

    the second one is very sweet.

    trisha
    http://sharmishthabasu.wordpress.com/2011/04/08/the-visitor-for-3ww/

    ReplyDelete

.Posts over eight days old will go to comment moderation - all genuine comments good bad or indifferent will eventually be published. Spam will be deleted. Many thanks for visiting today.