Something I wrote in April last year...

 LOCKDOWN

The lunatics are running the asylum

Trumpington and Twopence

have no cents sense

The trouble is we're all locked in

locked up

Lockdown not in my town

I'd rather be locked in the pub

drinking beer

whisky

vodka lemonade

But I'm afraid

The lunatics are running the asylum

King Karloff with his brand new prince

Nicola Fish

Haggis dish

cover yer kite in public hen

In Singapore they're building more

hospitals for the rich and poor

'cos they're expecting a second wave

of Coronavirus on their shores

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a pub

and how do you think they got there

through the back door

where they pulled up a chair

the doctor the vicar the undertaker

smoking cigars supping boilermakers

The trouble is we're all locked in

locked up

Lockdown your town too

and the lunatics are running the asylum

29042020

More from 2020...

 

FOR FITS SAKE

They told me at sixteen

You're too young to die

but we don't think you'll make twenty one

definitely not twenty five

In my seventh decade now

fighting fit for fits sake

Walking stick football

forty then forty five

came and went

Attack defence sub

Subbuteo Shove ha'penny

armchair TV

A new millennium

appeared swallowed me up

with all its apps aches

likes and dripping taps

Mobile madness

inbuilt sickness

inane sadness

The fat controller

breaks out Brexit

petit dejeuner demain

flu jab over

covert covid

Hold out your hand

and we'll stab you again

31122020/1

HAPPY NEW YEAR

 

NEARLY OVER

Another year kaput

the air borne

mind blown

window pain

No pane of glass

or grain of sand

everything swept

under the rug

to make a fresh start

Even the no mug flies have flown

We alone are caught

in the spiders web

Nearly over

it's not even begun

covid-21

31122020

For Nimfa...

 

DIFFERENT TYPE FONTS

She gets up and starts to dance

mellow music fills the studio

Creative innovative she comes

scissors in hand scrambling flowers

oranges bananas apples sometimes

colour blind but without loss of smell

I watch her decorate the studio

printing letters in different type fonts

rearranging them to spell something else

she paints white hearts on the pink walls

She tunes the radio and TV

puts headphones on and tidies the room

listens to the computer broadcast

types something quickly makes another film

As the music fills the studio

she gets up again and starts to dance

7112020

Song #199

 

WAITING FOR MY BABY

could it ever happen again

I didn't really plan it this way

I know you said no more last time

and the time before

sitting on the back step

waiting for my baby to come

I call you my baby

but you don't even know that I'm here

It's been the longest time

I never thought that it would happen

could it ever happen again

I didn't really plan it this way

I know you said no more last time

and the time before

but I know you're there baby

I couldn't get by without you

24102020

Football in the park ...

 

WITH THE KIDS

I just wanna play football with the kids

from dawn to dark the kids play football in the snow

but I'm too old I feel the cold

I just wanna play football with the kids

Subbuteo bar or blow table football I don't know

I've got me boots got me socks but I'm too old to take the knocks

I just wanna play football with the kids

I just wanna play football with the kids

from dawn to dark the kids play football in the park

but I feel as old as Noah's ark

I just wanna play football with the kids

Subbuteo bar or blow table football I don't know

I've got me boots got me socks but I'm as old as Goldilocks

I just wanna play football with the kids

10102020

 

It's my birthday and I'm re-posting this rhyming thing I penned in 2009

ANDY SEWINA

They said I’ve got to write a sestina
I said my name is Andy Sewina
Would you like a bite of my banana
How long till you get some new pyjama
Is that a felt hat or a fedora
Did you sail into the new marina

I once met a mermaid called Marina
I thought I’d tell you in this sestina
That I always wear an old fedora
She said is your name Andy Sewina
Lemontina do you wear pyjama
Oh but please please don’t drive me banana

Joey likes to eat yellow banana
When he pedalo to the marina
Everybody loves his blue pyjama
When he goes siesta with sestina
He dreams that he is Andy Sewina
Wearing a big coat and a fedora

You really can’t ignore a fedora
Even a squishy squashy banana
Won’t make you into Andy Sewina
So don’t go try to swim the marina
Who said it’s complicated sestina
It’s so easy peasey in pyjama

Do the drama school supply pyjama
I’ll bring a pair under my fedora
It’s time for us to sing my sestina
Ba ba ba bana bana banana
Ma ma ma mamma ma ma marina
Yeah lemontina Andy Sewina

Dance like fiesta Andy Sewina
Do Sucu sucu Cuba pyjama
Discotina down to the marina
Don’t forget to don your old fedora
Ba ba ba bana bana banana
Singer ringer dinger my sestina

Dreamer dreamer sestina pyjama
Andy Sewina with his fedora
Slip don’t trip banana skin marina

280109

napowrimo 2020 conclusion

napowrimo 2020 conclusion

Another napowrimo (poetry writing month) completed. This was my twelfth year of doing the thirty poems in thirty days challenge. The thing I had found in previous years was that two or three pieces would work out well and the rest would be pretty much discarded. This year, looking back over my entries I can't find one that I'm totally happy with. However, I think the point of the exercise is to produce a new piece of work each day, and as far as that goes I feel this has been a success. I will leave you with my favourite poem from the thirty published, REALLY BAD POETS (LIKE ME) which I think just about sums up the whole situation for me. Before I go, may I say congratulations to everybody who completed this years challenge.

REALLY BAD POETS
(LIKE ME)
Bad poets are really baaad
bad because we wanna be really baaad

Sad as it may seem to the educated
dreamer really baaad poets are bad
because they wanna be baaad

They repeat themselves too much
such and such rhyme all the time
internally and end line

Force the silly billy iambic pentameter
mount the syllabic count down to the ground
surround their act with half baked jokes

Baaad poets are really bad
baaad because we wanna be really bad

Stanza's verses couplets quatrains
we might as well be cleaning drains
nobody listens when we hum
or reads much beyond line one

But writing poetry can be fun
and I for one know that it keeps
me bleep bleep mad insane
a crazy simple writing game

Perhaps some baaad poets like me
only crave the irresistibility of mediocrity
that Wilde spoke about in Dorian Gray
then again maybe we wanna be bad

Sometimes we tell lots of lies
and plagiarise surprise surprise
Haiku Sudoku which one would you do
something simple cinquain please explain

Here we go again really baaad poets
like me (and I like them too) are bad
because we wanna be baaad
15042020

napowrimo 2020 #30

WHO IS THE THEY

Foolish as things may be

difficult as everything is

how I wish that my wish

about you could come true

hey that life would

be easy someday

However the weather

put paid to all that

seventy six was very very hot

but not as hot as

April twenty twenty

or so the they say

Who are the they

spouting it out

who are the they

shouting from the rooftops

who are the

great unwashed they

who are the

unbleached grey they

who are the jet black they

who are the

all shades of hades they

Foolish as things may be

difficult as everything is

how I wish that my wish

about you could come true

hey that life would

be easy someday

What say you man

give us yer dosh

check that

check back later

check

However the weather

put paid to all that

seventy six was very very hot

but not as hot as

April twenty twenty

or so the they say

Who is the they

who is the they

or so the they say

30042020

napowrimo 2020 #29 coronavirus 31

LOCKDOWN

The lunatics are running the asylum

Trumpington and Twopence

have no cents sense

The trouble is we're all locked in

locked up

Lockdown not in my town

I'd rather be locked in the pub

drinking beer

whisky

vodka lemonade

But I'm afraid

The lunatics are running the asylum

King Karloff with his brand new prince

Nicola Fish

Haggis dish

cover yer kite in public

In Singapore they're building more

hospitals for the rich and poor

'cos they're expecting a second wave

of Coronavirus on their shores

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a pub

and how do you think they got there

through the back door

where they pulled up a chair

the doctor the vicar the undertaker

smoking cigars supping boilermakers

The trouble is we're all locked in

locked up

Lockdown your town too

and the lunatics are running the asylum

29042020

napowrimo 2020 #28 coronavirus 30

BEFORE THE PANDEMIC
his world was made of whopping great lies

under the blanket he had cupboards full of them

tin cans rusting at the base sugar and flour stuck to the shelves

huge puddles the shape of England eating holes in the floor

stacks of bills for electricity and gas that he never used

I went to his house once about a week before the pandemic

about a month before he jumped off the bridge

It took me a while to find his place hidden deep in the forest as it was

I spent the day with him and he asked me what day it was nearly twenty times

somewhere under the bed he kept all of his secret things

way down in his inner consciousness below the concrete floor of his mind

was a perfect memory of all that he had seen and done

for people like me who found this hard to comprehend

he said the brain is just for thinking but the memory is where it's all at

that was the only time that I met him

I was happy to get out of there before the lockdown started

it all went pear shaped not long after that

28042020

napowrimo 2020 #27 coronavirus 29

ALL THAT FAKE NEWS

The further you come the harder you fall

whatever happened to Trumpingtons wall

You really believe that love comes easy

you download the app to your dog an' bone

you're so naïve so don't try to please me

I got your number right here on my phone

Don't listen to everything they tell you

they wind you up with misinformation

the situation should not make you blue

all that fake news and intimidation

King Karloff's come back from his country gaff

everything's rosy Downing street's cosy

no news from the front no reason to laugh

thinking of Lagos and of Nairobi

Whatever happened to Trumpington's wall

the harder they come the further they fall

27042020

napowrimo 2020 #26 coronavirus 28

THE SUNDAY PAPERS

Anti-body tests on stream dreamers dream beware

care homes hospices in our own homes who's counting

the dead they now forecast will be forty grand or more

support the lockdown defeat the virus

they're treating us like children the hot press screams

In Scotland we will be adult about this says Nicola Fish

the skies are blue bluer than they used to be

no haze today in this post production society of ours

no work no trains no cars go home you're barred

The Brexit backstop silly mid on has gone

they talk about the backdrop now what

ease the backdrop and all that clap trap trot

a public inquiry into all this palaver and

the way King Karloff handled this mess

Then there's this ding-a-ling with a telephone thing

I'm paranoid about the app to make it work

80% would have to download it

it's not an app it's a tracker and

a tracker is a trap that you don't want to fall into

oh it's okay phew because it's the NHS

that are planning to get this on stream

it's a testing and tracing app to save lives

Really do you believe what the Sunday papers say

Opt in to the anonymity of multiple countries

knowing where you are and what you're thinking

what you're doing and who you are talking to

I know what I think about that hows about you

It's easy with hindsight to say where things went wrong

to sing the Blame the culture blame the future song

Blame the present blame the past

blame the teacher blame the pupil

blame the widow blame the spinster

blame the Vatican blame Westminster

The political elite blame the scientists

for what they don't know but what they

don't know is that the scientists don't know

the truth is that no one knows and

the bottom line is we're facing the unknown

The trouble with the trouble is we have to stay at home

don't mix outside the bubble stay at home (drone drone)

save lives (I'm all for that) protect the NHS

However whatever happened to the promised PPE

the GMB and the TUC are still waiting to hear

meanwhile the stuff that we produce is being

sent elsewhere while we wait (sometimes in vain)

for basic stuff that's on a plane across the pond

who said if you buy cheap you (buy) suffer twice

Sunday brunch at the OK Coral

with Soul Power and the morality bunch

Yo-yo and the see-saw diet

die if you don't diet die if you do

who can you trust if the given must

is to ask you for money and more

Let your requests be known unto God

take care of the pennies and the pounds will fall off

or not as maybe or for a short while and

then you'll get fat again or fatter still but

the dollars will take care of themselves

26042020

napowrimo 2020 #25 coronavirus 27

BEETROOT SPAGHETTI

Covid-19 and all of that virus

Harry and the haberdashers of flash

never had it so good lay low furlough

papyrus poppycock and balderdash

Trumpington went up Capitol Hill

to fetch some disinfectant

the fool fell down the joke rebounds

amid much peals of laughter

Beetroot spaghetti and cornflake confetti

with cold stirred fried rice make something quite good

to chuck at the bride at her wedding day brunch

but there's owt for nowt in the lunch time steaks

They cook their own on their burner phones

with the red hot potato of HS2

the farcical social distance express

of parliament having returned from recess

They launch their new thingy into infinity

only to watch it crash into the night

King Karloff's website and all his henchmen

couldn't book tests for the nation again

25042020

napowrimo 2020 #24

THINKING OF THE CITY

Fanny said she wanted to play scrabble

picked up her cue and made a hundred break

The Riddler said scrabble is for rabble

Batman and Robin and that kind of freak

She shivers like crazy hates nudity

He shoots a double whammy towards her

She looks away thinking of the city

but the rotor lifts then sticks in her fur

If I had a relation in this town

she thinks I could beat that boo boy Riddler

equip me with a crib and dressing gown

paste him to the roof and call him fiddler

Like a jig-saw puzzle with missing tiles

central to her life another locus

she negates the future and walks for miles

putting the hex on his hocus pocus

Acre arcing she completes her mileage

crossing the diode bridge to Washington

pushing The Riddler into the silage

of his own mind the smell starts wafting down

She wished she could be gored by someone's horns

and vault into the ether not been born

24042020/Prompted by El Cashew

napowrimo 2020 #23 coronavirus 26

SAVE LIVES

When the smoke detector on the ceiling

looks like an alien staring at you

it probably is

Venus and Mars

were never like this

Stay at home

protect the NHS

from your vain imaginations

What came first

the seed or the plant

the cod or the roe

the man or the woman

the sun or the earth

whose nose knows who

Hard chicken comes from

hard boiled eggs

broken eggs make

omelette and frittata

Is a baton a thing to hit people with

or a lump of French bread

make your own

Stay at home

protect the NHS

save lives

23042020

napowrimo 2020 #22

SEAPLANE PIXEL

In the belly of the ship

or the whale or the fish

diving in the deep end

Squirming digging for

worms deep deep down

in the belly of the ship

what yacht have you got

Saturday's are like that too

who knows what time they close

who knows what time they close

Deep deep down in

the belly of the whale

or the belly of the fish

What fish cod 'n' chips

what chips potato fries

what fries open your eyes

what eyes mince pies

What pies pork pies

more pies for your

bread and honey

keep your money

don't tell me lies

What's your name

Please Explain

22042020

napowrimo 2020 #21

FASHION

Dandelion blue

Fashion on the internet

Blog blogging de blog

21042020

napowrimo 2020 #20 coronavirus 25

LIES MORE LIES

Mundane Monday the government

spokesman chokes he's another mug

he screams and shouts it out

we have been guided at all times

he cries lies more lies to cover up lies

blinded by science scientific advisors

don't blame the dog that guides you

hark at him barking up his own tree

there is a better way to live these days

without lies more lies to get by

for he knows not what we want

or how to separate the need from the greed

whatever happened to the PPE

I saw them squirming on the BBC

lies more lies to cover up more lies

Who's the lady with Mundane Monday

dressed much the same as yesterday

she smiles and everything seems fine

from Mannamead to Mutley Plain

for her to cover up lies with more lies

Boys and girls husbands and wives

stay home protect the NHS save lives

blast it from the rooftops baby

political lies surprise more lies

Mutley Plain is much the same

20042020

napowrimo 2020 #19 coronavirus 24

DUFF GOODS AND DEMI-GODS

Governments determine the statistics

the madness of all these logistics

They try not to lie - misled themselves

misleading us now telling us the lies

that they were told by their own demi-gods

King Karloff - Unsure Macron - Trumpington

Angry as angry people always are

our health depends upon us being cool

foolish as it may well seem from afar

bar con men making us some kind of fool

Relying on a shipment of duff goods

essential PPE from Antioch

misleading us - misled - this great mistake

it's something we can make on our home shores

The madness of all of these logistics

governments determine the statistics

19042020

napowrimo 2020 #18 coronavirus 23

CORONAVIRUS PERSONIFIED

We've spoken about the word world war before

what comes next and what to do for best

when they thought we'd won world war one

another fifty million or maybe more died

the following year from the Spanish flu

What ever are we going to do

when we all start dropping like flies too

things were never like this before

four five six or maybe more perhaps

Vivid dreams with nothing to cling to

screaming into the primordial soup

indifferent as rapid eye motion

past conditional responses up front

Infectious as genetic disorders

congenital imperfections undone

mysterious happenings de rigueur

Thought projection now you're talking

literally virtual reality

psychoanalysis self harming

Scientific academic failure

antibody immunity vaccine

vaccination inconsideration

illness coronavirus personified

18042020