2021 #7

 

Napowrimo 2021

Day SEVEN

HELLO AM I EVEN COOKING

I used to be the head chef at the Old Bamboo

but hello am I even cooking these days

someone comes to make my dinner every day

they take the packet out of the freezer

and bung it in the microwave for two minutes

They won't even let me boil or scramble an egg

I tried to make my own breakfast yesterday

but my home help came and turned the toaster off

You could burn yourself she told me sternly

They know absolutely nothing about cooking

but one of them says she has a slow cooker at home

I said Who's that your husband but she didn't laugh

The other girl said she's got an NVQ in housekeeping

I can believe that because she's not very quick

Whatever I do it's always my fault

The girls that come every day are never wrong

so when they say I can't have steak and chips

they're only telling me that for my own good

because I'd be too dangerous to cook it

I've started making no bake fridge cakes

Cheesecake to die for and Mississippi Mud Pie

I really want to make cinnamon rolls

but I'm not allowed to use the oven at night

or in the daytime when my helpers come

because they don't know how to use it either

07042021