Image prompt #11, Totally Optional Prompts
and Anthony North who's had enough NaisaiKu..
PINE NEEDLES HIS HAIR
You can’t see you, but he can
if you’ve got a speck of blue
on the screen in front of you
You can’t see him, but he can
see you, you see he’s the man
with the tree stuck on his head
You can’t see you, but he can
see you looking at him through
a pair of binoculars
You can’t see him, but he can
see you, he’s looking in the
mirror that I’m holding up
You can’t see you, but he can
he’s the man that took the snap
of me standing in the cold
You can’t see him, but he can
see you, you see he’s the man
that painted the lawn bright white
You can’t see you, but he can
see you, looking up at me
I can’t see you through this glass
You can’t see him, but he can
see you, see me, standing there
while he pine needles his hair
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Loved it! :-)
ReplyDeleteNow, it isn't that I've had enough of them whotsits; simply that I'm rubbish at any formula poetry.
I DO enjoy reading them. And may they live long.
They remind me of Fred Elliott. I say, they remind me of ... ;-)
Just enjoy reading your posts. There is so much fun in them.
ReplyDeleteOne small point-
Why does this thing
[if !supportEmptyParas][endif]
always come in the post?
you post
ReplyDeletei read it
i may not understand, but
i read it
pretend i said something
erudite and melifulous.
also,
ReplyDeletemy spelling is fine.
it is my typing that is lousy.
You hit it on the head!
ReplyDeleteBop it!
This was so much fun to read! I felt like I couldn't take my eyes away from the screen.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
Loved the simple power of this. Imaginative!
ReplyDeleteHi Tony, Thanks for playing along, it's just a bit of fun! Which reminds me I'll miss Coranation Street tomorrw 'cos I've got to go over to Liverpool for something. Phew!
ReplyDeleteHi Jeeves, thanks for the info on the code showing in the post. It sometimes happens on certain browers, I use Mozilla Firefox and everything looks sweet. However I went over to Internet Explorer and corrected it there, so hopefully the problem is solved for now. We have a different publishing issue on the NaisaiKu site which we are still trying to resolve. Flump!
ReplyDeleteHi Jack, your spelling sounds a bit like my eyesight. There's nothing wrong with my eyes - I just can't see out of these glasses!
ReplyDeleteHi Gautami, does that say hop it! or Bop it! (only joking, my eyesight's fine)
ReplyDeleteHi Kristina, thanks for visiting STG.. I'll be over to see the kids stuff as soon as I've fixed the puncture!
Thanks Deb, I only do simple thesedays!
Morrissey once appeared on Top of the Pops with a tree in his back pocket - I think he wanted peopke to see him.
ReplyDeleteAh, so good. So good. Oh, so good.
ReplyDeletelove it, love it!
ReplyDeleteI just pine needled my hair this morning...
A head-needling poem.
ReplyDeleteI pine for more!
how to tell how much i loved it !!!
ReplyDeleteHi Stan, I think he's still barking up his own tree!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sue@Tumblewords!
ReplyDeleteHi Angie, I can see it in your profile picture - lovely!
Hi Phil, yeah it's sort of cone shaped!
Hi Pretty You!! You leave me speechless!
STG, loved it. This is excellent. I begin to see where I went wrong. Great stuff.
ReplyDeletelove-bd
I like the way the repetition shifts and leads to new phrases. Fun to read.
ReplyDeleteHi bd, thanks for the comment! I really don't know where you went wrong though, I read all your posts and I think your poetry is wonderful!
ReplyDeleteThanks James, I just had to take a NaisaiKu break today!
Wow! This poem reads very well. The words just roll along energetically. Very nice one :)
ReplyDeleteBy the way, thanks for the comments on my poem. Take care!
Spectacular poem
ReplyDelete"While he pine needles his hair" I love this line and how you turned needles into a verb.
ReplyDeleteThe repetitions work so well!
Thanks Sam!
ReplyDeleteHi Ofira, you're too kind!
Hi Linda, I can think of plenty of things to do with needles...
I wondered a long time about this. Very amusing, indeed!
ReplyDelete