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Saturday 7 September 2019

Leave or stay...

So you wanna get outta here fast faster than a speeding shinkansen quicker than that air-ship that they said would change the world nothing does that that quick but everything that happens happens for a reason everything has a season a time to live a time to cry a time to do a time to dye your hair too many people want what they can't have want what you've got will drag you to the floor and will come kicking chicken licking raving and screaming to your Vardo caravan door who's selling tickets for the final curtain who can you trust when the government refuse to represent those that elected them please don't vote unless you're certain the little dzien dobry girls laughing in the factory canteen at the boys and down the hall the left luggage office whirls crammed to the hilt with broken toys the good old boys of the boys brigade no lack of moral fibre here missing in action presumed dead comrade we don't need this kind of fear if we leave what about the NHS if we stay what about the corporate debt on the right what will happen to this mess on the left looking for a deal I bet jaw jaw brexit what a bore we don't want this war no more who's going to pick the fruit if Italian Sam the man from Castel del Monte and the Romanian women can't come what will happen if all the Poles go back to Warsaw and the anomaly of it all is that the Irish can vote in the UK and the English don't even recognise Eire as a foreign country yet anyhow you can't leave the room and still stay in it you can't say one thing and do chuff all from the darkness the light was lit they tell me pride comes before a fall where there's a will there's a way what does God say about this mess the wind is ill for the people have no say the parting of the waters post traumatic stress see-saw whatsit yeah yeah hot foot we don't want this war no more they don't know not what we hoot jaw jaw brexit what a bore who's selling tickets for the final curtain please don't vote unless you're certain there's never a good time to get your feet wet die with your boots on hit them where it hurts carry on up the khyber sideways if you have to affix bayonets give it to them good style the trouble is that both sides have good points I guess that's why the vote was split too close making a deal is the wrong term to use to deal is to put your cards on the table cards is a gamble and someone will lose confusion illusion and all that jizz that'll soon fizzle out an arrangement would be a better word make for a better world with BM and her Mercedes friends but what about the backstop easy peasy lemon squeezy forget about the Mexican Berlin Hadrian's Wall all we have to do is to let Ulster and her 1.9 million punters which is a million less than the West Midlands or Greater Manchester and only a little bit more than Merseyside or South Yorkshire claim dual citizenship with Eire like that end of the Island wants them to and bingo job done whilst in days gone by er der yes busman at Maine Road the advertising slogan on the old main stand roof used to say around a million renters can't be wrong although four million more voters want to leave than stay but the forty eight per cent still need their say the vociferous mediocrity whatever happened to democracy all of the ball's got to be over all of the line or it's not a goal and we think that's fine according to technology first past the post will win no need to re-count the votes so what's the problem do you think that the fifty two per cent have changed their minds or perhaps that apathy has set in maybe that is the problem and the hope that things might change with another vote would a general election float your boat or another referendum dum dum to dumb things down in this mad circus for that clown but like I said thirty six or more moons ago nothing will change the rich will still be richer than the poor the skyscrapers will still go up like the prices for essential things according to the left wings press but fall almost drastically if you listen to the right so who's wrong anyway only time will tell and there's not much of that left or is there if the truth be known we'll most likely have another three years or more of indecision arguments and political unrest and here's me looking forward to that pre 1973 two pence Mars Bar and petrol at seven pence a litre and the thing that's not been mentioned yet no VAT on the other hand we have to look at the human rights employment laws and the safeguarding of the NHS if we leave without an arrangement they're anybody's guess and you couldn't trust Boris to deliver on climate change with his china plate playing top trumps with Don for fun with a dodgy card and a loaded gun up his manicured sleeve if I were you I would start growing potatoes 'cos by all accounts we'll be on war rations soon so get yourself a fishing rod or better still a canoe or two and catch some cod for fish and chips and make sure your ration book is up to date or you'll be late and stuck at the back of the queue for bread and honey and there won't be any money left at the bank you'll need a wheel barrow full of dosh to get some nosh do you really wanna leave hard cheddar cheese
070919/1000 words

Brexit exit XXI

Trick or treat don't confuse me not my muse
what could be worse than your chapter and verse
nothing adds up King Karloff's not much use
running with blinkers no time to rehearse

Euro no deal there's nothing to compare
they tell you sell you up the river gems
forty eight fifty two don't care how rare
bell bottoms flairs we're stitched up like their hems

Sixty forty mind the gap right to write
seventy thirty would be really fair
Karloff and his belly are not that bright
backstop cricket silly mid-on hot air

To do it right you need to do it well
get it right and there's nothing you can't sell